Kim Y

Yes happy ADORING fans! I am back! my back-ness exceeds all pre-emptive speculation because my back-ness is here! (btw, i have absolutely NO idea what i'm saying right now). let's make it short shall we? :)-- i've returned to livejournal (not that i was ever REALLY into it, just a quickie every now and then-- in which case 'i'll do it later' somehow magically transforms into 'i'll do it a bagillion days later'... something like that can only happen with the help of leprechauns man... yup... gotta be the leprechauns).

you should read my xanga for today's entry if you like my ranting :) oh boy was/am i a rant-a-rama tonight!

so i have absolutely NO idea how i'm getting to church tomorrow-- let's skip over the fact that i have to wake up at about 7am, shower, brush my pearly whites (more like stained yellows), eat, pack cucumber, and sit and wait for my ride. it's 10pm now, almost 11pm... i really should be getting to sleep soon-- for all intensive purposes-- i just felt like saying that... it sounds so professional-- like tv ads!

okay. time to get of the rant-mobile and start on the sleepy train.

Sorry for my various allusions to random motorcars-- my xanga was worse, it had allusions to my poor spelling... oh man did that sound dorkish...

hello appreciative audience, which is, i hope, no one because techinically no one should know i have a livejournal... but i mean, i put the link on my xanga... real discreet right?- yeah i know. (not to say i don't love you people)

so today was- what would you care? (not to be like, rude) you don't so let's just sum up everything that's been going on in the last couple weeks since i updated... let's see here: extreme busy-ness, need sleep-ness, oh and the ever beautiful know-you-are-human-ness, which must be really, the best one of them all...

*sigh* time to tinker with my guitar- got a new song, got many songs, just can't quite find THE chords for them...

ouch... my butt muscles hurt...

yeah, i know, yu didn't need to know that, but you know, you should- for reference purposes...

i know i'm not making much sense, i'm on a bread trip... had pumpkin swirl from Great Harvest...

okay, away from the trivial things... (but that's some dang good bread yo...)

i've been learning what grace is... somehow unsuccessfully... all these failed attempts, not even attempts even, just all these things failed every single day and then still... through all this stinkin rot... God still loves me, something that i had to struggle with when coming back at the start of each morning... whether it was really true... just how long did it take for God to break? why wasn't he yelling at me? shouldn't i be feeling the wrath of God? all taht stuff... fire brimestone, take your pick, but i couldn't understand why God kept telling me that he loved- loves- me even though i ran away, it was my choice... but then... it was grace... God's gift to us, his favor even when we don't deserve it...

God sees who we are and who we should be... and he sees the day when both of those will be together...

Well, obviously i'm not at school today...

I got rushed to the hospital last night...

now i have to get an epipen, and if you don't know what that is, if i get an allergic reaction that's THAT bad again and i have trouble breathing, they're gonna have to stick it into my leg...

i got IVed too... felt funny, i hate the tubes, the IV fluid was good though, made me feel better...

i want to be a paramedic now...

I can't waait for tomorrow =)

PAINTBALLING!!! shooting people with little pellets of paint, does life get any better than that? plus, playing guitar for praise, even better =D i feel like singing...

last night was... screwed... just ignore it.

i brought my coat to school, the winter one, i mean, come on people- it was less than 40 degrees this morning... but see... i didn't realize that my coat is like... HUGE... i look like a dork (well, i am one, but oh well...) carrying it around... so i left it in my locker and asked kim to get a guitar for me... and then ran around the school twice to get my coat before 7th pd.

i'm reading this book on king arthur and i couldn't help thinking, "man, this guy's life is screwed up..." and then turn around to realize, "oh man... my life is screwed up..."

When you ask God to peel away every layer of self... man... he really does peel EVERY freakin layer, even those that are hidden deep inside- the ones you don't even realize until you break...

"When everything inside looks like everything i hate,
you are the only chance i have,
you are the only chance i'll take..."
-On Fire- Switchfoot

... i have to tell you all... boys are one of the most sorry-sad creatures i have ever met... GO GET A CLUE and stop being so freaking insensitive... it's annoying and it hurts...

i'm sorry, i had to have my own emtional blab there... it's easier to write it in vague reference to people online rather than to stick it to their face i learned that... it causes problems like... them never speaking to you again, plus if you do, you're just being even more insensitive than they were being... i dunno, i'll just stop complaining here...

man... took me like 20 mins to figure out livejournal... *whisper* xanga is better *cough*

i've got tons of hw, no time to do anything at all... at least i got my bunny up there... =/

trying to get my bunny picture up... go bunny go!